What better way to pass a free morning than spending it repeatedly poking yourself in the eye for a few hours? Yes, I have been trying out contact lenses. What fun!
I have been finding wearing glasses whilst working very tricky. It is gradually descending from mildly irritating to downright tedious. I don’t need to wear specs all the time (yet) but can’t read a word without them. This translates in gardening terms to “spot weeds”, “find pests”, “read plant labels”. As anyone who has tried to walk about wearing reading glasses will know, this veers from comical to dangerous. So my specs go on for close up work and then off again to visit the compost bin. When not in use they sit on the top of my head where they get caught up in my hair which necessitates an inelegant and often painful removal when I need them next.
Only last week the pound shop glasses Farmer Tony generous donated to me, when I had forgotten mine and was squinting like Mr Magoo, fell off the top of my head at which point I promptly stepped backwards and crunched them. Tricky.
There has to be a better solution.
So when at a recent eye test they suggested contact lens, I thought, “why not give it a go?” They also mentioned the words “free trial”. Even better. I am not naturally squeamish. I love watching a good operation on the TV, but when it comes to the eyes being treated I can be found hiding behind the sofa looking for lost crisps. I am definitely eye squeamish.
Still I was game. Faint heart never won good eyesight. This morning was my initial appointment. All was well until I had to put them in. “What I have to do it myself?” Eventually I managed it, after much pushing and prodding and stretching and thoughts of “beam me up Scottie”. My tutor was a saint. And the result was great. No irritation, just much better eyesight, it was truly amazing. All was well. We had this cracked. Then I had to take them out. Or not, as the case might be. After an age trying, with eyes red and sore, I admitted defeat.
My humiliation culminated in an ethereal optician putting me in a headlock and removing the offending lenses.
But I’m not giving up. Yet.